Eat The Kids First. I know, this license plate has been bouncing around the Internet for a while. I am a zombie. Sometimes we move very slowly. I just wanted to say this is the greatest vanity plate I’ve ever seen. Kudos to the human, Garth Yeaman, who was able to transform such a cutesy design into something so wonderfully zombie. (I love how the added text changes the red hand prints from “finger-painted” to “bloody.” It’s pure genius!) Unfortunately, the Virginia Department of Motor Vehicles forced Yeaman to give the plates back. Read the complete story about his battle with the DMV on Jalopnik.
Trust me, when the living dead finally overrun the earth, the DMV will be one of the first things to go. Ever wonder why you never see a zombie driving a car in the movies? It’s because zombies hate going to the DMV. You may think to yourself, “Zombies should love the DMV! Its ability to attract incredibly long, slow-moving lines of living flesh would make it an attractive hunting ground for the undead!” But, I assure you, zombies have no interest in visiting a DMV office. The people there are mad and ready for a fight, and that is the last kind of prey any zombie wants to face.
[a zombie column]